Haa Ana Dza...

I hate my self..
I hate myself that this weak
which can not fight all that came damage..
damage the heart, mind, and all the passion that used to be overflowing

I hate that feeling..
it feels like I really want to scolding.. cursing..
everything that glorify it self
the feeling that has buried me down under the earth face..

but I can't!!

longer I hate it, stronger it force to break out,
indeed, that feeling is very uncomfortable, suffering..

and I hate you!!

you!!
the one that always harass my quiet night..
you!!
the one that successfully made me feel..
that I'm nothing!! not anyone!!

the one that hold me up to the heaven
and throw me down at the same time..
fall down to the full of thorns land..

I hate you,
and all of your wise helpful counsels..
and all of your suggested books that finally made me fall in love with them..

I hate you,
and all the things attached your name on it..
You're really break down my ego..

I hate you..
I hate..
I hate that I love you so..

:'(